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Space News Roundup: Energy Blasts, a Multi-Galactic Planet, and Skull Planet

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By Karna Firaliz

SAGITTARIUS ARM, Milky Way Galaxy – The energy blasts of two god-like beings, Orto and Monku, from 1,000 Earth years ago have finally made their way to the Milky Way Galaxy.  Orto and Monku’s ferocious battle is the stuff of legends, and it cost both beings their lives.  The reasoning for their epic battle is up for debate among historian, politicians, and the religious followings of each warrior, but one thing is known.  Their energy blasts were so enormous and powerful that they’ve been traveling the universe, passing through galaxy after galaxy for over 1,000 Earth years, destroying everything in their path.  Now, they’re headed for the Sagittarius Arm of the Milky Way in the next two Earth weeks, but as they’ve dissipated significantly over the past millennium, their strength isn’t expected to destroy any planets.  Planets with proper shielding will survive with minimal disruption while everything else can expect mild destruction.

PLANET ARTHI, Pegasus Galaxy & Andromeda Galaxy – In a strange case of spacetime entanglement, the single planet of Arthi is currently residing in both the Pegasus and Andromeda Galaxy simultaneously.  Normally a resident of the Pegasus Galaxy, Arthi got sucked into a rift in spacetime, similar to a wormhole, and now half of the planet is residing in the Andromeda Galaxy.  Thankfully, that new location was already empty and rotating a star, but its location in the Andromeda is nearly 10 million Earth miles farther away from its star in the Pegasus Galaxy.  Arthians have migrated to the Pegasus side for warmth and have asked for help from neighboring planets as all their most advanced technology is currently stuck on the Andromeda side, freezing over.

SKULL PLANET, formerly Planet Peace – An army of just 500 pirates overthrew the loose collection of “governments” of what used to be known as Planet Peace.  The inhabitants colonized the planet in the Pegasus Galaxy some 2,000 Earth years ago, and with the express purpose of being a peaceful, non-warring society.  Planet Peace attracted pacifists from all over the galaxy, and each group of settlers formed “governments,” which were little more than committees that planned parties, meditation séances, and the occasional orgy.  Money was outlawed, and the inhabitants relied on a barter system.  With no economy to speak of, Planet Peace was at peace for its entire existence, until last week when the pirates invaded.  They overthrew the “governments” in two Earth days.  The pirates’ stated they came to the planet for the orgies, but seeing as the next orgy wasn’t scheduled for another month, they became angry and started a fight.  Since Planet Peace had no military, the pirates ended up overthrowing the planet by accident.  The inhabitants willingly submitted to their new overlords, but the pirates just asked them to schedule an orgy for the following week.  They renamed the planet Skull Planet because it sounded cooler.