The New Romford Free Press

Tag: North-Star

  • ‘Reboot Man’ Denied Membership into Superteams for Being ‘Weird’

    ‘Reboot Man’ Denied Membership into Superteams for Being ‘Weird’

    rebootman
    Old photo of Ray Denver as North-Star

     

    by Stan Hopewell

    Ray Denver, the superhero commonly referred to as “Reboot Man,” has had a difficult life when he gained his superpowers several years ago.  Now, the veteran cannot land a job with a superteam.

    “This is pure discrimination,” said Denver, now going by the alias Clayman and exhibiting shapeshifting powers.  “Just because I’m a shapeshifter they think I’m a villain.  The Peace Force has at least three shapeshifters, so why am I being shunned by them?”

    The shapeshifters on the Peace Force are limited in their abilities.  Techno-Man can turn into electrical equipment, Orgo can transform into animals in a pink hue, and Super Stretcher can morph his body into most objects but cannot fully change his appearance.  In other words, none is a true shapeshifter by the UN Security Council definitions, whose legal definitions are used worldwide.

    Denver still believes he can pass any series of tests a superteam wants to know he’s not a villain.  “They can keep me on the reserve squad for a year to keep an eye on me,” he said.  “I’ll wear an ankle bracelet, have a computer chip implanted into me, I’ll let them read my mind once a week.  I just want to prove my mettle.”

    He also needs a paycheck.  Denver hasn’t been employed either as a superhero or a civilian in three years, and reportedly, has massive amounts of debt from his research trip to Alpha Centauri.  In the past three months, he’s been turned away from the Peace Force, the Amazings, SuperSeven, the Quinton School (for a teaching position), The Good Guys, and, curiously, QTpi’s, the all 16-under girls superteam.  “He was really weird,” said Mighty Mary, the 10 year-old leader.  “And super gross and old!  We don’t want weirdoes on our team.”

    Denver is considering legal action against the Peace Force and some other superteams, assuming he can find a lawyer to work pro-bono.  In the meantime, Clayman will patrol the streets of New York, New Romford, Philadelphia, and Boston in an effort to increase his “brand”.  “I’m just going to have to do this like the old days,” he said.  “I just need to get out on the streets and help the people.  That’s the only way I can prove myself.”

    “And if companies want to advertise on me, I’m open to that, too.  Just putting that out there.”

  • “Reboot Man” Denied Entrance to Meetings

    “Reboot Man” Denied Entrance to Meetings

    By Stan Hopewell

    rebootman
    File photo: Denver as North-Star

    The superhero dubbed “Reboot Man” by the press tried to gain entrance to the Atlantis-Peace Force Meetings but was turned away due to lack of clearance.

    Ray Denver, known as “Reboot Man” for his numerous identity changes over the past few years, started his superhero career as Star-Man.  He gained the powers of flight, super-strength, energy blasts, and energy manipulation from a pulsar while exploring Alpha Centauri.  This identity only lasted three months before the original Star-Man, Dan Stewart, spoke out against him using his old moniker.

    Denver relinquished his first identity and took up the name of North-Star, a name and costume inspired by the star Polaris.  He enjoyed a rather successful career in this guise and joined the Peace Force.  But this identity came to an end eight months later when he died fighting the Sparlox in deep space.

    Somehow, Denver was resurrected several months later in an explosion above the moon, which no one has been able to fully explain.  This time his powers included teleportation, and he became Portal-Man.  Unfortunately, one month later, he accidentally teleported himself into the bedrock below the Rocky Mountains of Colorado.

    Then, Denver absorbed the rocks to become Rock-Man, whose rock-based powers lasted only four months after he was caught in a mudslide in California and dissolved into the Sacramento River.  Five months later, he had absorbed the mud and clay from the river and can now apparently shapeshift.  He calls himself Clayman, and no one at Peace Force Headquarters recognizes him.

    “I’m a member,” he said.  “They know me.  I’ve fought side-by-side with them.  I even shapeshifted into my North-Star body and let them scan my mind.  They know I’m telling the truth.”

    Denver seemed depressed leaving the building.  He expressed how he thought he was dead in the Sacramento River and tried to convey how terrifying it was to become mud and clay.  According to him, it was a dark, wet experience that made him feel helpless.  Once he gained control of his newfound abilities, he turned into an eagle and flew across the country.  Denver acknowledged how often he’s changed identities and powers, holding back mud tears, but said it’s out of his control.  “How many of them control how they got their powers?” he said.  “How many of them have had reboots?  If it weren’t for one dumb thing or another, half of them wouldn’t even be in there.”

    Clayman, as he preferred to be called, left PFHQ in disgust.  When asked about a former member being turned away, Cloudwalker said, “He’s a shapeshifter.  After what happened last year, a creepy shapeshifter is the last thing we need.”