The New Romford Free Press

Tag: Pop Man

  • Nanites Finally Under Control

    Nanites Finally Under Control

    school

    By Buffy Bolivar

    The nanite rampage at the Quinton School for Young Superheroes is finally over.  Professor Stratosphere, with assistance from ATOM Labs and Dr. Amazing, were able to find the cause of the nanites’ malfunction and stopped their ceaseless building last night.

    “It turns out there was some malicious code in their programming,” said Professor Stratosphere.  “I won’t say for certain where the code came from, but I have some guesses on who could’ve put it in there.  One of our many enemies to be sure.”

    It had been three weeks since the rampage had begun as the nanites kept building new structures after the Pop Man attack on the day the school reopened.  The nanites crept to the school’s property line, threatening the residents of Carterson with gargoyle statues and spikes.  Faculty and students had been destroying buildings on a regular basis to slow them down, and they even got some of the residents to help out.

    Finally, the ordeal is over, and many of the students are relieved to be able to rest.  “It’s just been a lot of busy work,” said Jason Mirth, a.k.a. Stone Fist.  “My hands hurt.  I think I’m going to sleep for a week.”

    Before, the residents had to deal with all the noise of the destruction, but now that it’s over, there’s an eerie quiet in town.  “It’s really weird,” said Wanda Platt.  “Everyone had to speak up and yell, basically, to talk for the past week or so.  We all just got used to it.  Now, it’s really quiet, and no one wants to break the silence.

    “But I’m glad it’s over.  I just hope I can get to sleep tonight without all the white noise.”

  • Nanites Won’t Stop Building

    Nanites Won’t Stop Building

    school

    By Buffy Bolivar

    Now, the Muskrat admits, things are getting out of hand.  The nanites that Professor Stratosphere infused into the Quinton School’s buildings have been continually building new structures ever since the Pop Man attack from two weeks ago.   They’re threatening to overrun the school’s property line and spread out towards the town of Carterson.

    “We are working on a solution right now,” said the Muskrat in a written statement.  “We will do whatever is necessary to slow down the nanites before they reach the school’s property line.  Professor Stratosphere is working with ATOM Labs and Dr. Amazing around the clock to alleviate this situation.  In the meantime, both the faculty and students are working diligently to destroy any new buildings in hopes of forcing the nanites to rebuild them and stay on campus.”

    Indeed, residents of Carterson can hear the explosions from the Quinton School for Young Superheroes.  “Every few minutes you can just hear a large thud or kapow,” said Randy Scobel.  “I was just reading the paper this morning when I started hearing the explosions, and I spilled my coffee all over the place.  I could even feel my house shake on one of the really big ones.”

    Carterson mayor, Laura McKinley, has expressed deep concerns over the explosions and the nanites.  She said she objected to the nanites when Professor Stratosphere first told her about them, but since the school is outside the city limits, there wasn’t much she could do.

    “I told him these weren’t a good idea,” said McKinley.  “Obviously, I’m not a scientist, but there’s just something off about little machines.  I asked what would happen if they went rogue, and he assured me that everything would be fine.  I tried to look him straight in the face to get a reassurance, but his globe helmet makes it difficult to do that.”

    For now Mayor McKinley is urging residents to remain vigilant and ready to evacuate if they start to see gargoyle statues suddenly appear on their houses.

  • Quinton School Nanites Keep Building

    Quinton School Nanites Keep Building

    school

    By Buffy Bolivar

    The nanites of the Quinton School for Young Superheroes appear to keep rebuilding the campus, long after they’ve rebuilt the buildings that were destroyed last week.

    Pop Man attacked the school last week, exploding several buildings on campus, and was eventually arrested.  When reached for comment on the attack, Professor Stratosphere remarked that he infused the architecture with nanites, or microscopic robots, that would rebuild any structure within days.  Apparently, that time has come and gone, yet the nanites keep building.

    “Well, they do seem rather rambunctious,” said Professor Stratosphere.  “Of course, I’m monitoring them, but they seem to be adding gargoyles and spikes and such to the buildings.  They were never in the original blueprints, but they’re building them.  Adds a gothic quality to them.  Might raise tuition prices.”

    As to why they keep building, the Professor was still investigating.  They use the atoms from their surroundings to replicate the structure they rebuild, and the Quinton School sits on top a hill rich in many types of rock.  He could not estimate when they would stop.

    The Muskrat, who is the new headmaster of the school, could not be reached for comment as he was on a Peace Force mission in Quebec.

  • Quinton School for Young Superheroes Blows Up on First Day

    Quinton School for Young Superheroes Blows Up on First Day

    school
    By Buffy Bolivar

    It couldn’t even last one day.

    The Quinton School for Young Superheroes, which was reopened by the Muskrat yesterday, blew up on its first day of the new semester.  According to eyewitnesses in Carterson, Pop Man attacked the campus with explosive beach balls, one of his new explosive devices.  But the Muskrat, his staff, and his students were able to subdue Pop Man with relative ease.

    Reached for comment, the Muskrat only replied with “No comment,” but did later confirm that all of the students and staff were safe.

    Professor Stratosphere was the only staff member to comment on the attack.  “We should expect this each and every day, honestly,” he said through his filtered globe helmet.  “That’s why I’ve built these buildings out of nanites.  They’ll automatically rebuild themselves after being destroyed, so we should be back to normal in a few days.

    “Well, what passes for ‘normal’ around here anyway.”

    Pop Man was handed over to Britain’s MI666 so he could be returned to Broadspire Prison outside of London, where he escaped from a month ago.