The New Romford Free Press

Tag: Peace Force

  • ‘Reboot Man’ Denied Membership into Superteams for Being ‘Weird’

    ‘Reboot Man’ Denied Membership into Superteams for Being ‘Weird’

    rebootman
    Old photo of Ray Denver as North-Star

     

    by Stan Hopewell

    Ray Denver, the superhero commonly referred to as “Reboot Man,” has had a difficult life when he gained his superpowers several years ago.  Now, the veteran cannot land a job with a superteam.

    “This is pure discrimination,” said Denver, now going by the alias Clayman and exhibiting shapeshifting powers.  “Just because I’m a shapeshifter they think I’m a villain.  The Peace Force has at least three shapeshifters, so why am I being shunned by them?”

    The shapeshifters on the Peace Force are limited in their abilities.  Techno-Man can turn into electrical equipment, Orgo can transform into animals in a pink hue, and Super Stretcher can morph his body into most objects but cannot fully change his appearance.  In other words, none is a true shapeshifter by the UN Security Council definitions, whose legal definitions are used worldwide.

    Denver still believes he can pass any series of tests a superteam wants to know he’s not a villain.  “They can keep me on the reserve squad for a year to keep an eye on me,” he said.  “I’ll wear an ankle bracelet, have a computer chip implanted into me, I’ll let them read my mind once a week.  I just want to prove my mettle.”

    He also needs a paycheck.  Denver hasn’t been employed either as a superhero or a civilian in three years, and reportedly, has massive amounts of debt from his research trip to Alpha Centauri.  In the past three months, he’s been turned away from the Peace Force, the Amazings, SuperSeven, the Quinton School (for a teaching position), The Good Guys, and, curiously, QTpi’s, the all 16-under girls superteam.  “He was really weird,” said Mighty Mary, the 10 year-old leader.  “And super gross and old!  We don’t want weirdoes on our team.”

    Denver is considering legal action against the Peace Force and some other superteams, assuming he can find a lawyer to work pro-bono.  In the meantime, Clayman will patrol the streets of New York, New Romford, Philadelphia, and Boston in an effort to increase his “brand”.  “I’m just going to have to do this like the old days,” he said.  “I just need to get out on the streets and help the people.  That’s the only way I can prove myself.”

    “And if companies want to advertise on me, I’m open to that, too.  Just putting that out there.”

  • Another Future Muskrat With Dire Warnings Shows Up in Present

    By Packie Williams

    muskratweb
    File photo

    Ever since the invention of time travel in 1976, people have been using it to give dire warnings of future events to the past.  Today, another future version of the superhero Muskrat has shown up in Tompkins Square proclaiming doom and gloom for the future.  It’s the 12th future Muskrat to date.

    For some reason, Future Muskrat 12 had a braided beard flowing from under his mask and wore multiple necklaces and body armor.  He appeared in a blaze of light in the middle of Tompkins Square and got into a scuffle with the NRPD.  He fired laser guns at the officers and demanded to speak to his younger self.

    While Present Muskrat was en route from The Quinton School for Young Superheroes, Titana dropped in from the sky to have a word with the time traveler.  Apparently, this upset Future Muskrat 12.  He began firing his laser guns at Titana.  They fought for a couple minutes, throwing park benches and food carts at each other.  Present Muskrat jumped from his private jet along with a couple of his students and landed in between the battle.

    The Present and Future Muskrats had a conversation, though no word from the Peace Force or The Quinton School as to what was discussed.  After a minute of talking, Titana grabbed both of the Muskrats and flew them back into the jet while the students stayed behind to help clean up the mess.

    The Peace Force has a standard protocol they follow when a Future Visitor with Dire Warnings (a FVDW for short) comes to the present.  The FVDW is taken to the Peace Force Headquarters for evaluation and authentication, and then the FVDW has to fill out several forms about the dire warning.  The Peace Force is rumored to have a storage room dedicated to nothing but dire warnings.  Once the FVDW is authenticated as being a true time traveler, and their dire warning notarized, they are allowed to stay no more than three contiguous days in the present.  Then, they must head back to their present one way or another.

    The Peace Force is not required to disclose the contents of the dire warnings due to the sensitivity of the information, but the President and select world leaders are notified of each FVDW.

  • Speedster Helps with Recovery, Wrecks More Things than Repairs

    Speedster Helps with Recovery, Wrecks More Things than Repairs

    Speedster
    File photo

    By Buffy Bolivar

    While intending to be helpful as always, Speedster ended up making things worse today when she “helped” with the recovery after the Dino-Day Disaster.

    The majority of the Peace Force was working with the New Romford rescue crews to remove debris from fallen buildings and to find missing people, the typical superhero work.  Speedster was on hand as well today, and her super-speed began tearing up the Industrial and University Districts.  “I know she’s just trying to help,” said Sally Wynn, a resident of the University District, “but could she at least think through her actions first?  Just once, please.”

    Speedster saw a large pile of rubble blocking the intersection of Industry Road and 26th Street and used one of her patented “Speed Tornadoes” to move the rubble.  Unfortunately, she hasn’t perfected this patent yet.  She ran around the rubble at super speed, creating a vortex that carried the rubble into the air.  Then it shot out all over the neighborhood, crashing into buildings that had survived the dinosaurs on both sides of the Winston River.  Thankfully, no one was hurt, but she left the scene in a puff of dust.

    Someone at the Peace Force must’ve reprimanded her because she stopped using her “Speed Tornadoes”.  Instead, she helped out with the otherwise slow removal of debris from collapsed buildings, and for about an hour, Speedster was helping in a constructive way.  Then, she decided to speed things up, as she is wont to do, and wasn’t paying attention.  “We were working on buildings on Billings Street,” said Sal Hodgson, rescue worker, “and she piled up all that rubble at the end of the street.  She blocked us in.  We couldn’t get out.  We had about 20 people that needed to get to a hospital or safe zone, and we couldn’t get them out.  How dumb can you be?”

    After another half hour of making a path for the rescue workers, Speedster left to help somewhere else but caused a 14-vehicle pile-up on Romford Way before collapsing a parking garage on 4th Avenue and 59th Street.  She had removed the wrong piece of rubble that had been keeping the garage intact.  Luckily, she had removed everyone from the garage in the brief second before the collapse.

    By then, Titana and Adonis reportedly had a word with Speedster, and she ran off.  There were no more reports of speed-related destruction after then, much to everyone’s relief.

  • New Romford Mourns, Rebuilds

    New Romford Mourns, Rebuilds

    By Buffy Bolivar

    With the Dino-Day Disaster in the past, it’s time for New Romford to rebuild and mourn.

    As with most major superhuman events, the city has come to a standstill in the wake of the attack.  Most businesses are closed and will remain so for several weeks or months to come.  The city, National Guard, and Peace Force are helping with the clean-up and rescue effort.  At least 12,000 buildings and 8,000 roads are estimated to have been damaged in some way.  Power, water, sewers, and communications have also been damaged, and it may take weeks before they are fully restored.

    This all pales in comparison to the human toll.  City officials put the death toll from the Dino-Day Disaster at 79, and there are still hundreds missing.  Some died at the claws and tail spikes of the Dino Army, but most died simply by being in a structure that wasn’t meant to hold dinosaurs.  One subway worker got stuck in a tunnel and suffocated when he couldn’t escape.  A crew of eight sailors were in Windsor Bay when they all changed, sinking with their boat.  Others died by changing into a large dinosaur while inside a building, damaging its structural integrity.  When they changed back into humans, the building collapsed and crushed them inside.

    That said, this is nothing New Romford hasn’t seen or experienced before, and the city has come back from worse disasters.  The New Day attack of 2006 claimed 304 lives, and the Chymeran Incursion of 1976 claimed 543 lives.  New Romford survived and prospered after those disasters, and it will survive and prosper after the Dinosaur Queen’s attack.

  • Home

    Home

    By Chase Chapley

    Well, gang, thank you for reading my blog during this crisis.  I’m going home to find my wife, Charlene.  I was able to get a hold of her via a land line, and she’s safe.  This has been quite the ordeal, a weird one even by our standards.

    I hope everyone is safe and with loved ones.  We are New Romford, and we know how to survive.  Any breaking news will come from one of my colleagues.  Find someplace safe to sleep tonight.  Tomorrow, we rebuild.

    Good night.

  • Last of Dino Army Captured

    Last of Dino Army Captured

    By Chase Chapley

    With the Dinosaur Queen captured, the remaining members of the Dino Army have given themselves up to authorities.  The raptors and T-Rexes went down easily, and the flying members of the Peace Force have been captured the pterodactyls in a net.  The brachiosauruses, though, proved difficult to corral since they are huge.  Dr. Amazing appears to have set up a dimensional portal of some sort, and they went into it with a little prodding from Titana.

    The U.S. Army set up supply points at various intersections, providing food, water, and blankets to anyone in need.  The Red Cross has come in and set up medical bays as well.  The Mayor has announced these points for shelter.  Power is still out in many places, and hundreds, if not thousands, of buildings have been destroyed.  It’s going to be months before most structures are safe to reenter.  Also, sanitation is going to be an issue as dinosaur-sized feces are literally everywhere.

    It looks like we’ve escaped another disaster, but we’re not out of the woods yet.

  • Peace Force, Army Rounding Up Dino Army

    Peace Force, Army Rounding Up Dino Army

    By Chase Chapley

    The Peace Force seems to be at full force now as they, and the U.S. Army, are rounding up the Dino Army.  As predicted, the battle is one-sided.  The Dino Army is simply no match for superheroes and long range weapons.

    My colleagues and I borrowed some clothes from a store (which we’ll reimburse them for) and followed the sound of tanks and smell of laser beams down 21st St.  A T-Rex went flying past us at 18th Ave.  It was unconscious when it finally hit the ground, and then we heard the familiar blows and grunts of Titana punching another T-Rex in its face and knew how the first dinosaur became airborne.

    People were reveling in Titana punching a T-Rex in the face.  They were cheering with every blow, and my colleagues were joining in on the chants of TI-TAN-A, TI-TAN-A.  Finally, things were returning to normal.

    Titana was joined by Crater and Qu8N-J in physically rounding members of the Dino Army in an invisible force field.  They tossed or levitated roughly a dozen of them into what I can only describe as an invisible sack.  Then they flew away to more cheers and applause.