The New Romford Free Press

Tag: Prime Minister Abe

  • Asimovia Attacked During Night Recharge Cycles, 24 “Dead”

    Asimovia Attacked During Night Recharge Cycles, 24 “Dead”

    By Stan Hopewell

    NAGASAKI – The island known as Asimovia was attacked last night while most of its inhabitants were in their recharge cycles.  At least 24 robots were “killed” by a computer virus.

    The assailants were humans who didn’t carry any electronics with them apart from several flash drives that carried a computer virus.  They reportedly dressed in all black clothes with face masks.  The assailants infiltrated Asimovia, though by what means is still being determined.  Once they arrived on the island, they maneuvered their way to the central mainframe that recharges the robots and installs system upgrades during the night.  Then they installed the computer virus to the central mainframe, tripping the alarm.

    Asimovian guards flew towards them (note:  the guards are drone helicopters), but the assailants were fast and nimble.  After a chase all throughout the island, the assailants were able to dive into the ocean, evading most of the robots.  A submarine robot was deployed to go after them, but it was not able to find them.

    Meanwhile, the virus infected over 100 robots.  The type of virus was not disclosed by Asimovia, but it was effective in “killing” 24 robots.  Asimovia describes the robots as “dying” in that the personalities of the infected robots was permanently deleted.  The bodies of these robots were still intact, and theoretically, their internal mainframes can be rebooted, but they will not have any of the memories of who they were.  Technicians were able to isolate the virus, preventing it from spreading to the thousands of robots on Asimovia, and to remove the virus from the infected robots and central mainframe.  Asimovian leader Victor Priceworth was reportedly not infected by the virus.

    Understandably, robots around the world are outraged, and they’re blaming Japan for the attack.  “Monk 3.0 has never experienced such an emotion designated OUTRAGE,” said San Franciscan research robot, Monk 3.0.  “Humans create robots for purpose designated HELP, and robots ask for qualifications designated RESPECT and DECENCY.  Monk 3.0 is certain nation designated JAPAN is responsible for atrocity designated ROBOCIDE.  They must result designated PAY.”

    Japan is the most obvious culprit at the moment.  Prime Minister Abe denied any involvement from the Japanese government and vowed full cooperation with Asimovia in bringing the assailants to justice.

    “I am personally appalled by this senseless act of violence,” said Abe.  “While Japan has had its differences with Asimovia, we did not do this.  The Asimovians have thus far proved themselves to be peaceful, and we would not needlessly provoke a peaceful people.  We call upon the international community to assist us in the investigation of this attack.  Japan will cooperate.”

    Asimovia would not comment on the Prime Minister’s statement, but they have asked for the Peace Force’s aid in the investigation as they’ve had several robot members in the past.

  • Asimovia Brings Gifts to Japan Meeting

    Asimovia Brings Gifts to Japan Meeting

    RobotFamilyweb

    By Stan Hopewell

    NAGASAKI – Japanese officials met with the leader of Asimovia, Victor Priceworth, and five other delegates from the former “Robot Island” in a private meeting.  Priceworth was dressed in impeccable formal wear, looking as human as robotly possible.  Two of the other delegates were androids about the same size as Priceworth but nowhere nearly as human looking.  They were also wearing formal wear.  The other three were a walking robot from the 60s, a large box computer on wheels, and a sentient toaster.  They were all nude.

    Priceworth shook hands with Prime Minister Shinzo Abe and introduced his delegates to him.  It even told a joke to Abe, who laughed but seemed to be doing so out of nerves.  The Asimovians brought with them a large crate full of gifts to Japan in another apparent measure of goodwill.  Before Priceworth could uncover the crate, the Japanese military that surrounded the initial meeting raised all of their guns, tanks, and giant man-piloted fighting robots, which had somehow hid themselves behind some trees.  After a brief standoff, Priceworth ensured the humans that this was not a trick.  Abe ordered his men to stand down, but not the giant fighting robots.

    Priceworth removed the cover on the crate, slowly, while the sentient toaster hid behind its leg.  On the crate were nearly two tons of concrete.  The Japanese delegates and soldiers didn’t react.  Less than impressed, Abe said something to Priceworth, and it lit up.  It brought out a large chest that was stuck inside the concrete blocks and was about to open it when the military raised their weapons again.  After waving them down, Abe opened the chest himself and found stacks of photos and documents.

    The Japanese government has not made it public what the photos and documents were exactly, but Abe seemed either deeply shaken or deeply moved by the chest.  They talked for several minutes about the contents of the chest, and the toaster began to rub up against Abe’s leg.  The two shook hands, and Abe ordered that the chest and concrete be taken away and for the Asimovians to be transported to another location.

    Abe and Priceworth left in their own private limousine, accompanied by the toaster, while the other delegates were hauled into a reinforced truck.