The New Romford Free Press

Tag: Adonis

  • Michelle Meyers Pleads Guilty to All Charges

    Michelle Meyers Pleads Guilty to All Charges

    By Falco Rockbert

    In a court hearing this morning, Michelle Meyers pleaded guilty to all charges set against her, including kidnapping, conspiracy, and false endangerment.

    Meyers, the former Channel 9 News reporter, pleaded guilty to kidnapping a female associate of Adonis several weeks ago.  She also admitted to hiring 7 supervillains to pretend to capture here so that Adonis would “save” her from them.  Court documents show that Meyers and Adonis had a relationship that went bad some years ago.

    The guilty pleas were part of a plea deal with Meyers and the District Attorney’s office.  The deal was contingent on Meyers cooperating with the NRPD with investigations on the operations of the supervillains she hired and the communication networks she used to hire them.  In return, Meyers would receive a shorter sentence.

    Michelle Meyers will spend the next 20 years in medium-security prison with possibility for parole in 10 years based on good behavior.

    Adonis did not comment on the proceedings.  The Peace Force in a statement said, “We’re all glad this has reached a conclusion.  Adonis is currently out on patrol, and understandably, he has a lot on his mind.  We ask that you please respect his privacy for the time being, and we will not be taking any further questions on this matter.”

  • Atlantean General Behind Laval Attack, Arrested; Elections to Be Held in 2 Weeks

    Atlantean General Behind Laval Attack, Arrested; Elections to Be Held in 2 Weeks

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    By Skip Daverman

    PANAMA CANAL – In an abrupt turn of events, a rogue Atlantean General was arrested for staging the Laval attack on the Atlantis-Pacifica meetings, and King Morn A’Ganor has agreed to holding an election for Pacifica’s independence two weeks from now.

    With the aid of Adonis, Titana, and Micro-Man, who’s been in hiding during the investigation into the attack, Atlantean and Pacifican forces joined together to arrest Jor Q’Rell, a high-ranking General in the Atlantean military.  Suspicions that Atlantis was behind the attack had been bubbling for some time now, and using his diminutive size, Micro-Man gathered evidence on Q’Rell’s activities.  The General wanted to use the Laval attack to sabotage the meetings and unite both sides under a common cause.  He did not think the Lavals would be able to kill six Atlanteans and two Pacificans with the Atlantic and Pacific Guards protecting the meetings.  When confronted by King Morn and Viceroy Parr’Ell Montae, Q’Rell surprisingly surrendered without a fight.

    At this point, accounts of what transpired become muddled.  Everyone present in the meeting rooms of the Panama Canal all have multiple accounts of what happened with many similarities.  One account suggests that Q’Rell didn’t surrender but fought the King and Viceroy when confronted, and this spilled out into a full-blown battle between Atlantis and Pacifica.  Another account suggests that a battle ensued, and one of Q’Rell’s soldiers detonated a bomb, killing hundreds.  There were more accounts, but they all ended with a white light and with a reset to the moment Q’Rell was confronted.

    According to ATOM Labs, these accounts are all telltale signs of time travel.  “My guess is that someone either traveled back in time to prevent the battle,” said Professor Simone Givens, spacetime scientist at ATOM Labs, “or someone showed them possible futures in order to prevent the battle.  Either way, time travel shenanigans.”

    “And yes, that’s a technical term.”

    Whatever calamity was supposedly averted, Q’Rell and his forces were peacefully arrested and will be charged with several crimes.  The General’s forces will likely receive a variety of punishments, but Q’Rell will certainly receive the death penalty.  Their trials have yet to be set.

    After the arrests, tensions between the two sides eroded.  Atlanteans were just as upset over Q’Rell’s actins as the Pacificans, and King Morn and Viceroy Montae hammered out an agreement to hold an election to grant Pacifica its freedom.  It’s a startling turn for King Morn who was staunchly opposed to Pacifican independence.

    “Whatever he saw must have been worse than giving Pacifica their freedom,” said political observer, Luis Mendoza of the University of Panama.  “I can only speculate what he saw, but it’s not hard to imagine that he saw a civil war tear apart his kingdom.”

    The election will be held in two weeks.

  • Adonis, Titana Mediate Atlantis-Pacifica Meetings Around Rumors

    Adonis, Titana Mediate Atlantis-Pacifica Meetings Around Rumors

     

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    By Skip Daverman

    PANAMA CANAL – Adonis and Titana mediated a meeting between Atlantis and Pacifica today, by request of King Morn, after a rumor emerged that Atlantis staged the Laval attack from last week.

    During a meeting regarding Pacifica’s quest for independence from Atlantis, a small army of Lavals (lava monsters from underneath the ocean floor) attacked the proceedings.  It’s thought they saw an opportunity to eliminate both the Atlantean and Pacifican leaders at the same time, but they were forced to retreat after a fierce battle.  All but two Lavals escaped, however, and these two have been in Atlantean custody since the attack.

    Sometime during an interrogation by a Pacifican offical, that official supposedly caught on to a larger plan behind the attack.  A few days later, suspicion among the Pacificans has grown that Atlantis may’ve staged the attack.  That’s when King Morn called in Adonis and Titana.

    “I understand why King Morn called them in,” said political observer, Luis Mendoza of the Univeristy of Panama.  “On the surface, so to speak, they are third parties, very strong third parties, who will help make sure things don’t get out of hand.  But they also have a long-standing friendship with King Morn, and that can only escalate the situation.”

    “I just hope we don’t have a civil war brewing underwater.  That would have drastic consequences for everyone in the world.”

    Sources inside the meetings reported a noticeable rise in tension when Adonis and Titana arrived.  They are keeping out of the discussions, though, and have only stepped in to break up fights before they had a chance to begin.

    King Morn assured everyone that Atlantis was not behind the attack and that Adonis and Titana “will not pick sides in this matter.”  “We will resolve this, seaperson to seaperson, with our feet firmly planted into the seabed,” he said.

  • Michelle Meyers Charged with Kidnapping, Conspiracy, False Endangerment

    Michelle Meyers Charged with Kidnapping, Conspiracy, False Endangerment

    meyersBy Falco Rockbert

    The former Channel 9 News reporter, Michelle Meyers, has been formally charged with kidnapping and 18 counts of both conspiracy and false endangerment

    Weeks ago, Meyers kidnapped a woman described by the District Attorney, Jonathan Colbert, as “an associate of Adonis.”  Meyers did not harm the woman, but her confrontation with Adonis did lead the NRPD to investigate her other illegal activities.  These consist of paying supervillains to “capture” her so that Adonis would then save her.  A past romantic relationship between them is speculated as the reason for her behavior.

    Since the 1930s, several superheroes have been known as Adonis, and almost all of them have had a female journalist as a love interest.  The reason for this is unknown, but Meyers was the current love interest for this generation’s Adonis, and she had previously broken the record for most saves by one superhero.  The first love interest of Adonis was Janice McManis, which was the name Meyers used to rent the van involved in the kidnapping.

    The NRPD and Peace Force continue to investigate the supervillains Meyers had hired for the false captures.  Most have been cooperative in supplying information about her activities, but the NRPD and Peace Force are looking into where the money went after Meyers paid them.

    Meyers has been kept in her own private wing of County Jail as she awaits her next court hearing in the next week or two.  Altogether, the charges set against her, if found guilty, would send Meyers to prison for the next 40-50 years.

  • Legion of Adonis Returns to Defeat Dragons in England

    Legion of Adonis Returns to Defeat Dragons in England

    By Stan Hopewell

    LONDON – The Legion of Adonis returned to our universe last night to battle dragons which had invaded our dimension for unknown reasons.

    Twenty-three Adonises from parallel universes and our very own Adonis joined battle for the first time in eight years.  The Adonis from Earth-477, a magic user, was apparently beating back an army of dragons in his dimension when they grabbed one of his magic staffs.  Then, they started hopping to other dimensions.  Earth-477 Adonis pursued them, but as the dragon army grew with dragons from other Earths, he had to reform the Legion.

    The battle spilled over to our Earth in the woods of England.  Our Adonis was contacted by Earth-1,022 Adonis, the robot Adonis, and quickly flew to join his other selves.  When our Adonis entered the fray, hundreds of dragons were burning the countryside.  Five Adonises were trying to stop the dragons while another two were trying to contain the fires.  The rest of the dragons and Legion were in other dimensions but engaging in similar battles.

    Earth-24,044 Adonis, the ape Adonis, was the heaviest hitter of the bunch on our planet, and that’s no small feat considering there were seven other Adonises in the area.  He was able to down half of the dragons all by himself, while the others took down the rest.  At various points in the battle, all the dragons and Adonises were sucked into another dimension, and reportedly, all twenty-four Adonises fought the lead dragon together in the final battle.  Thankfully, no civilians were injured in the battle, but hundreds of houses, farms, and roads were destroyed.

    The reason for the dragons’ attacks were not revealed to the public, though sources inside the Peace Force mentioned a magical amulet in Earth-34 being a possible target.  The amulet used to reside in Earth-477 but was now in Earth-34, again for unknown reasons.  Given that Earth-477 Adonis’s magic staff requires precision magics to use, the dragons probably didn’t know how to hop to Earth-34.  Earth-477 Adonis came to suck the dragons back to another dimension where they wouldn’t hurt anyone else.

    The seven Adonises that appeared on our Earth were robot Adonis (Earth-1,022), ape Adonis (Earth-24,044), Egyptian Adonis (Earth-788), two white female Adonises (Earth-2 and Earth-90), one black female Adonis (Earth-3), and Mole Man Adonis (Earth-2,033).

  • Cape Finder Used by Meyers in Kidnapping Case

    Cape Finder Used by Meyers in Kidnapping Case

    By Falco Rockbert

    The popular app, Cape Finder, is facing new scrutiny after it was revealed by the NRPD that Michelle Meyers used it to track Adonis and kidnap a woman.

    Arturo Studios, the maker of Cape Finder, released the app several months ago as a “fun way to watch superheroes” and to “crowdsource the movements of supervillains”.  Upon its release, several attorneys for superheroes expressed concern over the potential for supervillains to track them and their families.  Now it looks like those concerns have come to pass.

    “Ms. Meyers used the app Cape Finder on her phone and her laptop,” read an NRPD statement, “to track the movements of Adonis for the past two months.  She used the pins of other users to specifically target Adonis.  She followed his movements and the movements of the people he was with, using that knowledge to commit her fake rescue encounters and to kidnap a woman in an effort to confront Adonis.  It was integral to her plans.”

    Arturo Studios released its own statement, following the police report.  “We’re shocked, dismayed, and offended that someone would use our product in such a destructive manner.  We apologize to Adonis and to the woman who was kidnapped.  This was not the intent of the app, and most people have not used it as such.  Many of our users love it for telling them where to look in the sky for their favorite superheroes.  That being said, we have disabled our servers for the time being while we figure out a way to make our product safer.”

    This statement may not save Cape Finder or Arturo Studios.  According the CNET, the app has already been deleted from 50,000 devices in the past two hours.  “So many people are just getting rid of it,” said CNET editor, Marleen Franken.  “And I don’t know how they can retool the product to ‘make it safer’ when the whole point of the app is to track superpeople.”

    “You might as well try to get Facebook to stop reading your profile to sell you ads.”

  • Meyers Hired 7 Supervillains to Stage 18 Fake Rescues

    Meyers Hired 7 Supervillains to Stage 18 Fake Rescues

    By Falco Rockbert

    While the surprising news that famous news reporter, Michelle Meyers, was involved in a kidnapping a week ago is still kept secret by law, the bigger revelation of her ties to supervillains is starting to unravel itself.

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    Michelle Meyers

    The NRPD have said that Meyers hired at least 7 different supervillains to stage 18 fake “rescue situations” for her.  They interviewed the Master of Disaster and Keymaster, the last two supervillains Adonis “rescued” her from, in prison, and both confessed to being paid by Meyers.  In exchange for shorter sentences, they told the police and the DA how they were contacted, how they coordinated their actions, and how they were paid.  Using this method, the NRPD were able to locate wire transfers and large cash withdrawals on 18 separate occasions over the past five years.  The Master of Disaster was her most popular supervillain to employ, having paid him on 8 occasions.

    With payment records, the police were able to identify 18 “rescue situations”, and then it was just a matter of looking back at each situation.  The five other supervillains were Lightning Bug (3 situations), The Tortoise (2 situations), Mary Marauder (1 situation), Baby Bouncer (1 situation), and The Bee’s Knees (1 situation).  Keymaster was hired for 2 situations.

    Why Meyers would go to such lengths is not being discussed by the NRPD as it seems to be linked to the kidnapping.  For years, it’s been rumored that Meyers and Adonis were in a romantic relationship, but perhaps their relationship had soured in the past five years.  Whether the kidnapping and the “rescue situations” are related has not been disclosed, as the police are still in an ongoing investigation.

    Adonis was available for comment, and the Peace Force would not issue a comment.