By Buffy Bolivar
The “Ghostwriters” who were trapped in Little India by necromancers were turned away from court today as ghosts are not a covered class in New Romford law.
Section 8 of the New Romford City Charter was last amended in 1997 to admit beings from other dimensions or timelines, aliens from other planets, sasquatches and yetis, and pansexuals as a covered class. It has been amended thirteen different times to cover a total of 58 distinct classes, by far the most of any city in the country. Being a covered class allows for full protection under the law, but ghosts have never been added despite numerous attempts. The last of which died in 2004.
“These posthumous-Americans deserve full protection under the law just like they had full protection when they were alive,” said Saul Mortenson, lawyer for the Ghostwriters. “They were exploited by these necromancers, and they and their families deserve justice and compensation for their work.”
The Ghostwriters were held against their wills by five necromancers several weeks back and forced to write paranormal teen romance novels in the basement of a Little India building. Five necromancers were arrested but ultimately not charged with any crimes. At least one more was never caught, and there could’ve been more than that. The publishers of their novels have been debating whether to sue them or not, but according to sources, they may ultimately not sue as their novels have seen a boost in sales.
Despite being turned away at court, Mortenson vows to press ahead with lawsuits. “My clients were kept against their will to basically work as ghost slaves,” he said. “And to write terrible paranormal teen romance novels. Is this the kind of horror we are willing to allow?”