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Crakosi Troop on Planet Gigano Still Believes Galactic War 4 Is Happening

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By Karna Firaliz

PLANET GIGANO – After crashing on the gigantic planet Gigano in the outer Milky Way over 150 Earth years ago, a troop of Crakosi soldiers blasted off from Gigano and attacked a Telori freight ship, still thinking that Galactic War 4 was happening.

For Earthlings unfamiliar with Outer Milky Way history, Galactic War 4 was a conflict between primarily the Crakosi and the Telori that started when a Telori passenger ship was destroyed in an asteroid belt via unusual means.  The Telori believed the Crakosi, their longtime enemies, to be responsible, and the fourth Galactic War began.  After 12 Earth years of battle among 320 star systems and 87 nations, the Crakosi side won, leaving millions dead.  Over the past century, tensions between the two nations have relaxed, and they’ve become trading partners and allies.

Gigano is a gigantic planet four times the size of Jupiter with a gravitational pull 40 times greater than Earth with, apparently, a 150 Earth year gravitational time dilation.

“It’s the reason no one ever goes there,” said Telori physicist, Mjorn A2.  “The heavy gravity slows down time so much that when you leave, decades have passed to those outside of the planet’s gravitational pull.  Who knows how much time this crew experienced?  It was probably [an Earth week or two] to them.  But to us, [150 Earth years].  So of course they think the war’s still going on.”

The Crakosi troop attacked Telori freight ship App App 2833 after recognizing the Telori flag on its side.  The crew didn’t try to fight back when the Crakosi drew their weapons, so thankfully, no one was hurt.  But the mixture of Telori and Crakosi crew members on the App App tipped the soldiers off that something was amiss.

The troop leader read the ship’s manifest to see the date, and that was the end of the takeover.  The leader asked the ship’s captain about the war.  After some initial confusion, the captain explained how the war was over and the two nations were friends now.  The future shock left the Crakosi troops dazed and confused.  Eventually, they left.

“They were really shaken up,” said Ion Mattoix, the ship captain.  “They really took it hard, don’t you know, and I can’t even imagine what they be thinking.  It’s a hard life to be a soldier, and to think their loved ones be gone to the sands of time, aye, what a lot they be.  What a lot.”

The Crakosi and Telori are reportedly investigating the incident and hope to find the lost crew.

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