The New Romford Free Press

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New Nations Form in Los Angeles Gridlock


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By Buffy Bolivar

LOS ANGELES – The permanent gridlock on the freeways and streets of the greater Los Angeles area has created more than just chaos.  It’s created new nations as well.

With vehicles stuck on the freeways or the main roads, people haven’t moved much further than where their vehicles have parked.  Some local residents have offered to house stranded drivers while others have been living in parks, alleys, and whatever buildings in which they can find refuge.  And the Terminator Gangs and Na’vi Nation have seized the opportunity.

The Terminator Gangs have taken control of much of eastern Los Angeles and formed an area called Battlezone just southeast of Dodger Stadium, where disputes among gang members take place.  The Na’vi Nation has taken control of the most land, taking up land from La Habra in the south to all the territory north of the 210.  To compete with the rampaging fandoms of James Cameron movies, the Jedi Republic formed in the Pomona-Ontario-San Dimas regions, though the Na’vis aren’t scared of them according to neighboring nations.

The rest seem to be a hodgepodge of local residents or displaced drivers rising up to power.  A family of centaurs has taken control of Huntington Park, Queen Arga, a witch claiming to be from 16th century England, is ruling Fullerton, a 55 year-old trucker, Fred Lloydman, has proclaimed San Fernando to be a constitutional monarchy called Fredistan, and millions of bees have taken control of Leimert Park, though no one knows if one queen bee is in charge or if multiple queens are.

Some “nations” are neighborhoods that have tried to transport people out of the gridlock without success.  Scientists in Westmont and Inglewood tried digging a hole underground but only dug up lava, somehow, and scientists in Gardena tried opening a wormhole but only succeeded in sucking 30 blocks into oblivion, leaving a crater 50 yards wide in its wake.

The studios have largely banded together south of the 101, Warner Bros. and Universal being the dual rulers, but Disney has taken over two nations and is arguably the most well-organized.  The Disney Lands take up much of the land around Disneyland, including most of Anaheim, Orange, and Santa Ana, and the Northern Disney Lands take up the triangle between the 101, 170, and the 5 where Walt Disney Studios and the Bob Hope Airport are located.  Rumor has it that they have a secret tunnel allowing the two disparate states to connect, but that’s been unconfirmed so far.

Not much is known about the other nations apart from the names given to themselves, but everyone, from local mayors to the governor, is surprised by how quickly communities broke down and rebuilt themselves after the permanent gridlock.