The New Romford Free Press

Your most superheroic news source.

Dinosaur Queen Turns New Romford Into Dinosaurs

  • Home
  • Local
  • Dinosaur Queen Turns New Romford Into Dinosaurs
dinoqueenweb

File photo

By Chase Chapley

Twenty-two minutes ago, the supervillain known as the Dinosaur Queen emitted a ray of energy that turned everyone in New Romford into dinosaurs.  Twenty minutes ago, she released a video on YouTube admitting her actions and demanded New Romforders to “praise” her.

“Praise me, New Romford!” she said.  “It is I, the Dinosaur Queen, who has transformed you into the beautiful creatures you are now.  You are now faster and stronger than you ever were before, and soon the whole world will be as such.”

“Praise me, my new minions!  Praise me!”  She ended her speech laughing and then abruptly ended her video.

Indeed, everyone, as far as I can tell from the NRFP offices in the Dumont Building, has turned into some species of dinosaur.  Large to small, flying to land-based, the diversity of species is wide-ranging.  I’ve turned into a raptor with feathers, but I’ve yet to determine which species I am.  The NRFP staff has also been transformed, yet I am one of the few still capable of using a keyboard.  My dinosaur body has “fingers”, and I will write as much as I can on my laptop though it is taking me longer to type than normal.

The internet connection here is still running, but I don’t know for how long.  Out my window, I can see large dinosaurs have crushed buildings and downed power lines.  My cell phone is fluctuating the number of bars, so I would have to assume some communication towers have fallen as well.

I will update this site as best as I can for as long as I can.  Stay safe.

Tags: